I feel as if I must find the words to comfort those I love,
Especially a woman I am proud to call family,
For I know she faces a future that was not at all what she planned
When they told each other “I do”
And they held each child for the first time,
And they built the life they wanted piece by piece and day by day,
Until what they had seemed fortress-strong and guarded by warriors.

And in one night the world went from birthday party celebrating to the hospital way of life.

But when your fortress is strong and your warrior is brave, that hospital way of life
does not take over everything.

For there are dinners to make and practices to attend and homework to do and skinned knees to bandage and the warrior lifestyle is not for the weak.

And as the months ticked by and the appointments stacked up and those children got bigger and their love kept growing that fortress never crumbled.

And how do you comfort when you know it will never be ok, but it will be ok. It will never be the same but so much will be the same.

The dinners will get made and the practices will happen and the homework will get done and those skinned knees will get bandaged.

So I think the words I’m seeking keep leading me back to the tireless work it took to build this fortress; for the love and the fellowship and the humor and the spice and the strength and the courage poured into the foundations for when the warrior departed he knew what he left behind him was solid. It is hurting and it is changed but it is solid.

And cousin - please hug our dads up there. I love you and I will see you again someday.

“And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.”
John Donne’s Death, be not proud